Stage 5: The Journey Outward
Several weeks ago, I mentioned a LEGO set I had received for Christmas and the process of putting it together to match the directions that came with it. There were 64 pages of directions and 608 bricks to create the picture on the box.
Recently, when I was looking at the direction book, I realized there are two alternative ways to build the LEGO orchid. The alternatives use all the same pieces; they just configure the flowers in different ways to vary the look of the plant. The foundation of the build remains the same, but the blooms change.
Stage 5: The Journey Outward is a bit like reconfiguring the LEGO set. The previous stages we’ve journeyed through have helped to establish a strong foundation. We know God more deeply, and we know ourselves more deeply too. Before, we might have only seen one way of building our lives, but as we’ve wrestled with what we believe and who God is, we can begin to imagine more ways to build our lives.
Hagberg and Guelich write, “At stage 5 the ponderous work of the most intense healing lies behind us. We continue to be healed and come more alive in various ways throughout life, but the concentrated darkness is over for now. The movement to stage 5 is on the horizontal, the outward, the reaching out to other people from a sense of fullness, of being loved by God, and being asked to love others in return. It is such a natural process that we hardly recognize it happening. Our hearts are different and our lives evolve from that change. As we said before, people at this stage may even be surprised at the talents, skills, or qualities they have been given in order to be horizontal people - qualities that they did not know they had.”
When we consider that our hearts are different and that our lives evolve from that change, we may need to pause for a moment to grasp that truth.
God did not create us as babies to remain babies. The intention was that we would grow up - not only in the physical but also in the spiritual sense.
All through our lives, we are being formed. And each part of that formation plays a role in shaping who we are becoming.
Stage 5 isn’t about forgetting all that has come before in our journey and reinventing ourselves as if the life we’ve lived hasn’t happened. Instead, it is about noticing how the previous stages have shaped us. What are the hard bits that required utter dependence on God? What are the parts of our story that have deepened our compassion and care for others? Who are the people that have shown us unconditional love so that we too might show that love to others? What are the gifts that have been dormant because they needed time to develop?
Along the way, our confidence has deepened. We are able to say yes or no to various opportunities with greater ease because we are developing a greater sense of how our time is best spent.
Hagberg and Guelich write, “We do not burn out at this stage. We know ourselves well enough to avoid, or if necessary to tolerate, emotionally draining situations or job settings. We are given insight and grace by God to keep ourselves continually aware of our emotional and physical health and limits…. Living in and through the Spirit of God, we serve others out of love. We can even love beyond our own constraints, because God is at work enabling and activating us.”
I think that 1 Peter 4:8-11 is a helpful picture of what living out Stage 5 might look like - “Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins. Be hospitable to one another without complaint. As each one has received a special gift, employ it in serving one another as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. Whoever speaks, is to do so as one who is speaking the utterances of God; whoever serves is to do so as one who is serving by the strength which God supplies; so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belongs the glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.”
Unlike in other stages, we don’t really get stuck in Stage 5. However, others may feel that we are stuck, as the ways we are showing up and using our gifts might look different than in the past.
Within our faith communities, it is important for us to remember that we are all being formed uniquely. God has created each of us with various gifts and the Holy Spirit is at work in each of our lives to help develop the gifts which have been given. This journey looks different for each person. We can identify similarities as we move through various stages of growth, while also acknowledging that each person’s story is unique to them. It is not a competition. It is an invitation to deeper growth.
Ultimately God is inviting all of us to come “further up and further in” as C. S. Lewis would say. And with that we find ourselves moving into Stage 6: The Life of Love.
More on that next time.
~ Melissa